I'm hearing alot of things about tights lately. People seem to come in two groups, group a the "tights are not pants" group, and group b the " body confidence fuck it I wear what I want" group.
Both of these groups are right. Tights are not pants, but if you want to wear them as such, go for it. THAT BEING SAID, there is ettiquette to wearing tights as pants. Let me tell you all about it.
FIRST OFF, for the love of god ladies, lets make sure your tights are opaque. I'm sure you don't want everyone to see the goods all day. Flaunt what you've got, hell yes, but I don't wanna be able to see your pubes through nylon. Thank you.
Secondly, Camel toe. Make sure you don't have any.
Lastly, be sure that you are wearing your tights as pants in a situation approperiate way. ie. you arent wearing them to the office, you are wearing them to go shopping etc etc.
Thats all
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Things I Fucking Love: Acessories!
So, story is that I've found some really interesting things on the internet over the past few days, acessorie wise, let me show you my findings.
First off, these 7 deadly sins rings. Aren't they just utterly gorgeous?
My absolute favorite is the pride ring. Partly because I'm a ridiclously prideful person, and partially because it's GORGEOUS, it's big and flamboyant, and slightly reptilian, and I love it.
Next up are these amazing bowties. I love me a bowtie, but these just take the cake, I prefer the top one, iwth the roses and chains coming off of it, its tough, but still sort of sweet. I also quite like how the bowtie itself sort of looks like a butterfly with the subtle snakeskin pattern on it.
Last up are these two necklaces. I want them. So bad. The one on the left is a T S Elliot quote, and the right is Virginia Woolfe. I really like the floral detailing on the T S Elliot, but the simplicity of the Woolfe is stunning. Plus, I sort of love that two of my passions (words and fashion) are coming together to make something beautiful.
What do you think? Love em? Hate em?
Love,
Lia
ps. I don't know who to credit for the photos, or for the jewlry itself, so I appologize for that, if anyone knows anything, please let me know!
First off, these 7 deadly sins rings. Aren't they just utterly gorgeous?
My absolute favorite is the pride ring. Partly because I'm a ridiclously prideful person, and partially because it's GORGEOUS, it's big and flamboyant, and slightly reptilian, and I love it.
Next up are these amazing bowties. I love me a bowtie, but these just take the cake, I prefer the top one, iwth the roses and chains coming off of it, its tough, but still sort of sweet. I also quite like how the bowtie itself sort of looks like a butterfly with the subtle snakeskin pattern on it.
Last up are these two necklaces. I want them. So bad. The one on the left is a T S Elliot quote, and the right is Virginia Woolfe. I really like the floral detailing on the T S Elliot, but the simplicity of the Woolfe is stunning. Plus, I sort of love that two of my passions (words and fashion) are coming together to make something beautiful.
What do you think? Love em? Hate em?
Love,
Lia
ps. I don't know who to credit for the photos, or for the jewlry itself, so I appologize for that, if anyone knows anything, please let me know!
Monday, February 14, 2011
I Judge You Based On the Muffin You Buy
So story is, that today at work I realize that I judge random people based on the muffin that they buy. Now we at The Grocery Store have 5 types of muffins that we sell on a daily basis. WestCoast Trail, Raisin Bran, Double Chocolate Chunk, Cranberry Raspberry, and Blueberry. Pretty typical.
Blueberry. Your a basic, average, salt of the earth type of person. Blueberry is an uninspired muffin, and yet, its still a classic muffin. I don't judge you harshly, in fact, I might like to get to know you. You seem sensible. And I know you like yummy, if not exotic things. Your ok in my books.
You're boring. Or old. Or old and boring. You crave stablity and things that will, and have been, around forever.
Cranberry is a sassy flavor, its got some punch to it. It's like the burlesque dancer of muffins, at first its just cake, but then WHABAM yedoggy FLAVOR. I probably like you, if you're a cranberry muffin type of person, because I'm a sassy pants too.
I tend to really like chocolate muffin people. They're either sex on a stick, a child, or in need of comfort foods. I could get down with any of those three things.
I really don't like westcoast trail muffin people they are generally people who're
a) Trying to trick themselves into thinking they're being healthy by eating a carrot muffin with nuts on top, while trying to supress the fact that they are, indeed, just downing carrot cake. Which I don't have a problem with, but fuck, stop applogizing for wanting some carrot cake. Its delicious.
b)boring
c) Hippie dippie types who arent hardcore enough to go to the health food store for a vegan muffin, and just want to look like they're eating trail mix or granola or some junk.
Last pet peeve of the day: people who, in a grocery store that doesnt have the option "to stay" say "I would like a carrot/chocolate/blueberry muffin to go".
Why are you bothering to say "to go"? You can't stay. Theres no where to sit. "To stay" is not an option we offer. Regardless of the muffin you order, if you say you want it to go, I'll think your an idiot. Especially if you come in every day. Regulars should know better by now. I mean really.
What kind of muffin do you eat?
Love,
Lia
Lia
Blueberry. Your a basic, average, salt of the earth type of person. Blueberry is an uninspired muffin, and yet, its still a classic muffin. I don't judge you harshly, in fact, I might like to get to know you. You seem sensible. And I know you like yummy, if not exotic things. Your ok in my books.
You're boring. Or old. Or old and boring. You crave stablity and things that will, and have been, around forever.
Cranberry is a sassy flavor, its got some punch to it. It's like the burlesque dancer of muffins, at first its just cake, but then WHABAM yedoggy FLAVOR. I probably like you, if you're a cranberry muffin type of person, because I'm a sassy pants too.
I tend to really like chocolate muffin people. They're either sex on a stick, a child, or in need of comfort foods. I could get down with any of those three things.
I really don't like westcoast trail muffin people they are generally people who're
a) Trying to trick themselves into thinking they're being healthy by eating a carrot muffin with nuts on top, while trying to supress the fact that they are, indeed, just downing carrot cake. Which I don't have a problem with, but fuck, stop applogizing for wanting some carrot cake. Its delicious.
b)boring
c) Hippie dippie types who arent hardcore enough to go to the health food store for a vegan muffin, and just want to look like they're eating trail mix or granola or some junk.
Last pet peeve of the day: people who, in a grocery store that doesnt have the option "to stay" say "I would like a carrot/chocolate/blueberry muffin to go".
Why are you bothering to say "to go"? You can't stay. Theres no where to sit. "To stay" is not an option we offer. Regardless of the muffin you order, if you say you want it to go, I'll think your an idiot. Especially if you come in every day. Regulars should know better by now. I mean really.
What kind of muffin do you eat?
Love,
Lia
Lia
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Tiny Little Magic Cottage
So, story is, that whilst I was cruising around the internets today, checking up on some of my favorite blogs, I stumbled upon something amazing. This lady, somewhere, a short while ago, took an old cottage, just sitting there on her property, and renovated it into this glorious little victorian shabby-chic hideout. Its a grownup fort. I want one, I wish I had one when I was little.
Let me show you what I mean...
Is'nt it just utterly delightful? SO CUTE! This place is only 100 or so feet by the look of it, maybe 130, its an itty bitty tiny little house. And I'm going to guess that THAT is the lady who built it! Look at it (and her) in a dream house, surrounded by their own private little forest.
Look at the comfy looking couch, and the table, and all the white, and oh lord, is that a chandelier? I love that there's flowers everywhere, and man alive, do I love the fact that she has books!
Oh My God. A bed, in a nook, a nook thats like its own little tree fort, or a fairy hide away. Now, this place does'nt have a bathroom or a kitchen, but I sure hope it has a kettle because down below, a little table, for drinking tea and eating small cakes with whip cream and strawberries.
And the perfect little front step. Complete with bright pink boots, and flowers. *sigh*
I am head over heels enchanted with this little place. It's romantic, ethereal, and utterly charming - maybe thats what I am right now, charmed, because this little dream has character!
Love,
Lia
Let me show you what I mean...
Is'nt it just utterly delightful? SO CUTE! This place is only 100 or so feet by the look of it, maybe 130, its an itty bitty tiny little house. And I'm going to guess that THAT is the lady who built it! Look at it (and her) in a dream house, surrounded by their own private little forest.
Look at the comfy looking couch, and the table, and all the white, and oh lord, is that a chandelier? I love that there's flowers everywhere, and man alive, do I love the fact that she has books!
Oh My God. A bed, in a nook, a nook thats like its own little tree fort, or a fairy hide away. Now, this place does'nt have a bathroom or a kitchen, but I sure hope it has a kettle because down below, a little table, for drinking tea and eating small cakes with whip cream and strawberries.
And the perfect little front step. Complete with bright pink boots, and flowers. *sigh*
I am head over heels enchanted with this little place. It's romantic, ethereal, and utterly charming - maybe thats what I am right now, charmed, because this little dream has character!
Love,
Lia
Thursday, February 3, 2011
I Miss Me
So, story is,I went to England for September 2010. I went by myself, with an enormous backpack, and my parents cautionary words echoing in my ears. I've been back for a few months now, I'm into the swing of things, work, friends, family, the daily grind. And I miss the girl that traveled. I miss how fearless I was when I was on my own, I miss the riks I took, and the way I used my body to take me places I hadnt been before. I miss meeting new people, and daring myself to just go out and fuckin do it.
I don't feel like the same person here. I'm more sedentry, and I hate that, I'm not as outgoing because I'm in my hometown and here, there are concequences to my actions, whereas there, there were not, because in that whole entire country, no one knew me. I was more myself, freer than I've ever been before. I did what I wanted when I wanted to. I was fiscally responsible for myself. No one was there to hold me back.
I feel like alot of the people I know here, at home, caution me. They talk me out of taking risks, they talk me into being safe. It's making me crazy, going from feeling so alive, and busting out of my protected little shell to having to fit back into it. I absoutly cannot stand that I let myself be imposed upon this way. I know these people only have my best interests at heart, but when nothing thats said is posative, its alittle hard to run on constructive critisisim.
I miss the girl who would keep walking down a street just to see where it ended, who would find herself lost in a city not her own, and, intstead of freaking out, just figure out where the hell she was, and bus back to where she needs to be.
I miss feeling the best I could feel getting out of bed in the morning, knowing that that day was going to fuckin rock.
I think, most of all, I miss being self sufficient. There was always that little edge of fear that kept me on my toes, constantly savoring life, because life was good. Here, I don't have that fear, that drive to keep going, to do something new. Or rather, I have the drive, but its bottling up inside me, and I'm about ready to pop.
It's 4 months until I move from my hometown to a city thats close by, and man, I tell you, I can't wait.
I don't feel like the same person here. I'm more sedentry, and I hate that, I'm not as outgoing because I'm in my hometown and here, there are concequences to my actions, whereas there, there were not, because in that whole entire country, no one knew me. I was more myself, freer than I've ever been before. I did what I wanted when I wanted to. I was fiscally responsible for myself. No one was there to hold me back.
I feel like alot of the people I know here, at home, caution me. They talk me out of taking risks, they talk me into being safe. It's making me crazy, going from feeling so alive, and busting out of my protected little shell to having to fit back into it. I absoutly cannot stand that I let myself be imposed upon this way. I know these people only have my best interests at heart, but when nothing thats said is posative, its alittle hard to run on constructive critisisim.
I miss the girl who would keep walking down a street just to see where it ended, who would find herself lost in a city not her own, and, intstead of freaking out, just figure out where the hell she was, and bus back to where she needs to be.
I miss feeling the best I could feel getting out of bed in the morning, knowing that that day was going to fuckin rock.
I think, most of all, I miss being self sufficient. There was always that little edge of fear that kept me on my toes, constantly savoring life, because life was good. Here, I don't have that fear, that drive to keep going, to do something new. Or rather, I have the drive, but its bottling up inside me, and I'm about ready to pop.
It's 4 months until I move from my hometown to a city thats close by, and man, I tell you, I can't wait.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Shoes! That are roses! Wow!
So, story is that I found the most increidble shoes, totally by accident, while I was Googling "awesome shoes". Check them out.
Look at the sheer and utter magnificence that is these shoes. These shoes look like a flower. How fuckin cool is that? If you get lucky enough to wear them, your foot will be nestled inside of the warm, velvety embraces of a rose, briarless vines will caress you, and a bee will be poised daintily above your toes. Even the gold heel references roses, with its thorny looking outcroppings.
I have no idea where I'd wear them, but kids, I think this is a Make It Work moment (bless you Tim Gunn). If I had something this amazing, I'd Make It Work. In fact, I'd just throw them on with jeans and a plain white t, and be like, "look at those amazing fuckers on my feet. Just look at them!"
Special Occasion Shoes? pshpshhht
Thoughts? Reflections? Love 'em? Hate 'em? Tell me how you feel!
Love,
Lia
Look at the sheer and utter magnificence that is these shoes. These shoes look like a flower. How fuckin cool is that? If you get lucky enough to wear them, your foot will be nestled inside of the warm, velvety embraces of a rose, briarless vines will caress you, and a bee will be poised daintily above your toes. Even the gold heel references roses, with its thorny looking outcroppings.
I have no idea where I'd wear them, but kids, I think this is a Make It Work moment (bless you Tim Gunn). If I had something this amazing, I'd Make It Work. In fact, I'd just throw them on with jeans and a plain white t, and be like, "look at those amazing fuckers on my feet. Just look at them!"
Special Occasion Shoes? pshpshhht
Thoughts? Reflections? Love 'em? Hate 'em? Tell me how you feel!
Love,
Lia
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Things I Fucking Love: Michel Tcherevkoff
So, story is, during my browsing today, I came across something rather incredible, or rather, someone. His name is Michel Tcherevkoff, and his work is amazing. He describes it as reality with a twist, and it encompasses a few of my favorite things. Namely flowers, fashion and beauty.
He does many things, but I'm going to spotlight his flower shoes, lingere, and just acouple of the handbags.
ps. this is basically a picture dump with a small amout of commentary. Just so you know.
Enjoy!
Calla lillies, roses, orchids oh my! Are'nt those shoes just amazing? If I were a fairy, I'd get in contact with Monsieur Michel. (He's french.oooo)
I'm going to show one handbag, and then we're just going to be moving onto my favorite portion of tonights entertainment... the lingere!
Look at his use of colour and pattern with these orchids/petals, its incredible! And moreover, its beautiful in a way that only a natural thing can be. *sigh*
Next up is what you've all been waiting for! The Fantasty Flower lingere collection!It is utterly incredible, so prepare yourself to be blown away. I chose my favorites to share, were I you, I'd high tail it over to his website to have a better look!
My favorite is the first one, with the orchid panties, it looks almost as though she's wearing a strap on, and I love that.
What do you think? Is Michel T just as amazing as I think he is, or am I quite the daft bugger?
Love,
Lia
He does many things, but I'm going to spotlight his flower shoes, lingere, and just acouple of the handbags.
ps. this is basically a picture dump with a small amout of commentary. Just so you know.
Enjoy!
Calla lillies, roses, orchids oh my! Are'nt those shoes just amazing? If I were a fairy, I'd get in contact with Monsieur Michel. (He's french.oooo)
I'm going to show one handbag, and then we're just going to be moving onto my favorite portion of tonights entertainment... the lingere!
Look at his use of colour and pattern with these orchids/petals, its incredible! And moreover, its beautiful in a way that only a natural thing can be. *sigh*
Next up is what you've all been waiting for! The Fantasty Flower lingere collection!It is utterly incredible, so prepare yourself to be blown away. I chose my favorites to share, were I you, I'd high tail it over to his website to have a better look!
My favorite is the first one, with the orchid panties, it looks almost as though she's wearing a strap on, and I love that.
What do you think? Is Michel T just as amazing as I think he is, or am I quite the daft bugger?
Love,
Lia
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Things I Fucking Love: Heels
So, story is that I havent posted in quite some time, because I am a very very bad blogger; furthermore it has come to my attention, that my last couple of posts before this one were sort of down trodden, and I think that sucks, so, we're going to look at some pretty pretty pictures, of one of my greatest obsessions: shoes. To be specific, heels. I fucking love heels. I love them. Which, I've been told his hilarious, because I have ladies 11/12 feet, and not even that but I have 11/12 WIDE feet.
"Good luck finding heels Lia", you smirk, as you walk along in your cute little size 8's. Well fuck you. A girl can dream right?
On that note, let me share with you some of my latest loves
These shoes are amazing. Look at the bright yellow, look at the stilletto, look at the platform, goooooooood lord, if only if only. I've been utterly obsessed with yellow heels since I saw these a few months ago, they're sassy, gorgeous, and oddly cheerful, with that kick of sexy that I love, aaaaand, speaking of sexy...
Check out these lovelies, now check them again! DO you have whiplash? NO? You havent checked them out hard enough!
I love the bubblegum pink, I love the heel hight, I love the pointy toe. I want them with jeans, I want them with dresses, and holy man alive do I want them with a swishy crinoline'd black with white polka dot skirt, because man do I love me some vintage look!
Oh my lord, look at all these shoes, an absolute plethora I tell you. There are a few pairs here I'd like to point out. First up are those oxford style booties right there in the middle of the top row, deep red, black piping? See them? Oh god, what I could work with those, I would sit and whisper to them how pretty they are, and how, it seems to me that they have just a little bit of badassery snuggled up in there.
Next up in orange, is the shoe that those yellow kicks are blocking, you can only see the obsenely high heel on them. Can anyone else imagine prancing their ass about all over town in those little babies? Generally I hate orange, but these hit some sort of essential button in me. I think I just need that hit of happy that is all up in these.
Third to the block all the yellow ones. Have I mentioned that I love yellow?
Grass green peeptoe slingbacks: I'm not totally in love with the heel, generally chunky heels don't work for me in any way shape or form, but these seem in keeping with the shoe. I might trade them for a fabric wrapped cone heel, but I'd still take them as is, and work the shit out of them.
In the cooler spectrum of the rainbow, I like the blue heels. I like the snake skin ones, I like the strappy ones, but best of all I like the ones with the rosette. I like the shade of blue, I like the rosette detail, I like the way there's an angle to the side of the shoe, and I like the heel of it.
Purple. Where the fuck do I even start. I want 7 of 10 pairs of these. I think most of all, I want the bottom row. Narrowing it down even more, the shiney bright ever-so-high-heeled booties. If they were black, they would look stern and foreboding, but with that purple, and the little zipper mm mm good. Good like Garfeild loving lasagne. But sexy.
Thats what I have to say about that right now. Look foreward to more shoe posts, as well as whatever strikes my fancy. Because thats what I do.
Tell me though, readers, if you read, do you like any of my shoe fancies? Do you have any of your own? AND, most importantly, do you know of anywhere in Canada that caters to big feet at affordable prices?
Love,
Lia
"Good luck finding heels Lia", you smirk, as you walk along in your cute little size 8's. Well fuck you. A girl can dream right?
On that note, let me share with you some of my latest loves
These shoes are amazing. Look at the bright yellow, look at the stilletto, look at the platform, goooooooood lord, if only if only. I've been utterly obsessed with yellow heels since I saw these a few months ago, they're sassy, gorgeous, and oddly cheerful, with that kick of sexy that I love, aaaaand, speaking of sexy...
Check out these lovelies, now check them again! DO you have whiplash? NO? You havent checked them out hard enough!
I love the bubblegum pink, I love the heel hight, I love the pointy toe. I want them with jeans, I want them with dresses, and holy man alive do I want them with a swishy crinoline'd black with white polka dot skirt, because man do I love me some vintage look!
Oh my lord, look at all these shoes, an absolute plethora I tell you. There are a few pairs here I'd like to point out. First up are those oxford style booties right there in the middle of the top row, deep red, black piping? See them? Oh god, what I could work with those, I would sit and whisper to them how pretty they are, and how, it seems to me that they have just a little bit of badassery snuggled up in there.
Next up in orange, is the shoe that those yellow kicks are blocking, you can only see the obsenely high heel on them. Can anyone else imagine prancing their ass about all over town in those little babies? Generally I hate orange, but these hit some sort of essential button in me. I think I just need that hit of happy that is all up in these.
Third to the block all the yellow ones. Have I mentioned that I love yellow?
Grass green peeptoe slingbacks: I'm not totally in love with the heel, generally chunky heels don't work for me in any way shape or form, but these seem in keeping with the shoe. I might trade them for a fabric wrapped cone heel, but I'd still take them as is, and work the shit out of them.
In the cooler spectrum of the rainbow, I like the blue heels. I like the snake skin ones, I like the strappy ones, but best of all I like the ones with the rosette. I like the shade of blue, I like the rosette detail, I like the way there's an angle to the side of the shoe, and I like the heel of it.
Purple. Where the fuck do I even start. I want 7 of 10 pairs of these. I think most of all, I want the bottom row. Narrowing it down even more, the shiney bright ever-so-high-heeled booties. If they were black, they would look stern and foreboding, but with that purple, and the little zipper mm mm good. Good like Garfeild loving lasagne. But sexy.
Thats what I have to say about that right now. Look foreward to more shoe posts, as well as whatever strikes my fancy. Because thats what I do.
Tell me though, readers, if you read, do you like any of my shoe fancies? Do you have any of your own? AND, most importantly, do you know of anywhere in Canada that caters to big feet at affordable prices?
Love,
Lia
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Fucking Work
so, story is that I'm having some anger right now. Here's why: I was in my last little bit of my shift today at work, and was super excited to get off. My coworker, who is closing the store tonight decided to go for break exactly a half an hour before I left. Our breaks are half an hour long, and I figured that he'd be back on time seeing as he knew that I would be off as soon as he got back. 5:30 rolled around and no sign of him. I took a deep breath and delt with a few more customers. Ten minuites later, he rolled in the door. As he came into my department, I was taking my apron off to leave. I looked at him, and said something along the lines of "You're late. Please don't be late"
I was tired, my feet hurt, and the customers were pissing me off. He looked me straight in the face and went "I'm not late. I left at ten after. Sorry"
I could have delt with it if he had just said "shit, I lost track of the time, I'm sorry" but no, he had to lie to me. And not just that, but he lied to me in a way that made me feel like I was the bad guy here, which I tell you, makes me want to punch a wall, or something to that effect.
So here's my question: why is it that everytime I've been angery about something, some man comes along and finds a way to make me feel as though its my fault? When did this start being ok?
I was tired, my feet hurt, and the customers were pissing me off. He looked me straight in the face and went "I'm not late. I left at ten after. Sorry"
I could have delt with it if he had just said "shit, I lost track of the time, I'm sorry" but no, he had to lie to me. And not just that, but he lied to me in a way that made me feel like I was the bad guy here, which I tell you, makes me want to punch a wall, or something to that effect.
So here's my question: why is it that everytime I've been angery about something, some man comes along and finds a way to make me feel as though its my fault? When did this start being ok?
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Random 5 Questions Blog
1)You have a liscence to kill. With your liscence to kill, who do you kill?
Ok, first off, I'm actually going to change the question to "With your liscence to kick someone in the balls, who do you kick?"
Now, the answer to this question, is my neighbour, The Jackass Next Door (I don't actually know his name, because this is all my family has ever called him, though I have a sneaking suspision that his real name is Micheal, which sucks, because I've always liked the name Micheal, and I hate when people I don't like have names I like)
Why, you ask, would I like to kick my neighbour in the balls? Well, he made my mom cry, so he can go fuck himself :D
2) Have you ever seen a dead body?
No, but I did scatter my grandmas ashes when she died. Does that count?
3)Grossest thing you've ever seen?
Crocs with socks
4)TV show you never miss
I fucking love Lost, but thats over, so I'll have to confess my secret obsession with Project Runway, Say Yes To The Dress, Cupcake Girls, and What Not To Wear. Dont hate me.
5) How big is your bed? Big enough?
My bed is a queen size, which is big enough for one, I guess, BUT, I want a big fucking bed. I want a bed the size of two king size beds pushed together. You know why that is? Because, for some reason, I can't sleep with someone else in the bed, so I figure if they have the equivalant of their own bed, I'll be good to go. Yay me!
thats all.. take the questions, pass them on,
Love,
Lia
Ok, first off, I'm actually going to change the question to "With your liscence to kick someone in the balls, who do you kick?"
Now, the answer to this question, is my neighbour, The Jackass Next Door (I don't actually know his name, because this is all my family has ever called him, though I have a sneaking suspision that his real name is Micheal, which sucks, because I've always liked the name Micheal, and I hate when people I don't like have names I like)
Why, you ask, would I like to kick my neighbour in the balls? Well, he made my mom cry, so he can go fuck himself :D
2) Have you ever seen a dead body?
No, but I did scatter my grandmas ashes when she died. Does that count?
3)Grossest thing you've ever seen?
Crocs with socks
4)TV show you never miss
I fucking love Lost, but thats over, so I'll have to confess my secret obsession with Project Runway, Say Yes To The Dress, Cupcake Girls, and What Not To Wear. Dont hate me.
5) How big is your bed? Big enough?
My bed is a queen size, which is big enough for one, I guess, BUT, I want a big fucking bed. I want a bed the size of two king size beds pushed together. You know why that is? Because, for some reason, I can't sleep with someone else in the bed, so I figure if they have the equivalant of their own bed, I'll be good to go. Yay me!
thats all.. take the questions, pass them on,
Love,
Lia
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Things I Fucking Love: Awesomeness Because of BP Oil Spill
SO, story is that just because every damn body else is complaining about the oil spill and the utter tragedy attatched to beaches and small animals being coated in oil doesnt mean that no good has come of it!
Here's a list of A Few Good Things That Have Come From The Oil Spill
1) The BP Drinking Game
For those of you who don't know yet, here's how to play:
step 1) Grab yo crew
step 2) Grab yo drink-o-choice
step 3) Turn on the ridiclous bullshit that is CNN
step 4) Bitch loudly about how stupid and biased Anderson Cooper is, when the news is supposed to be an unbiased source of information
step 5) Drink on the words "BP" "Oil" and 'Responsibility"
I promise you'll have a good night, and that you'll have to stop drinking within 20 min :D
2) This delightful rhyme:
"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
Who died in an oil spill becaues of BP?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!"
3)I get the opportunity to bitch about what a biased craptastic "objective reporter" Anderson Cooper is. Also, he thinks that he's pretty, and thats just fuckin annoying. My dentist thinks he's pretty too, but thats a whole nother story...
4)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AAa0gd7ClM&feature=player_embedded#!
5)This comic :D
(I stole it from the blog OBVIOUSWINNER, it's not mine, just so everyone knows)
So, thats my list, I hope you liked it, don't hate me for seeing the hilarious in an obvious tradgedy..
love,
Lia
Here's a list of A Few Good Things That Have Come From The Oil Spill
1) The BP Drinking Game
For those of you who don't know yet, here's how to play:
step 1) Grab yo crew
step 2) Grab yo drink-o-choice
step 3) Turn on the ridiclous bullshit that is CNN
step 4) Bitch loudly about how stupid and biased Anderson Cooper is, when the news is supposed to be an unbiased source of information
step 5) Drink on the words "BP" "Oil" and 'Responsibility"
I promise you'll have a good night, and that you'll have to stop drinking within 20 min :D
2) This delightful rhyme:
"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
Who died in an oil spill becaues of BP?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!"
3)I get the opportunity to bitch about what a biased craptastic "objective reporter" Anderson Cooper is. Also, he thinks that he's pretty, and thats just fuckin annoying. My dentist thinks he's pretty too, but thats a whole nother story...
4)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AAa0gd7ClM&feature=player_embedded#!
5)This comic :D
(I stole it from the blog OBVIOUSWINNER, it's not mine, just so everyone knows)
So, thats my list, I hope you liked it, don't hate me for seeing the hilarious in an obvious tradgedy..
love,
Lia
Saturday, July 17, 2010
An Aside About Me
So story is that I'm feeling a little melancholy today. Because of this, we're going to take a break from my usual brand of sarcastic, critical, possibly offensive, and slightly angry brand of humor ( and by brand of humor, I mean "oh god, I hope people think I'm funny").
I had people over last night, we laughed, we drank, we reminiced because we've all known eachother for a long time now. It was a good night... this morning, I woke up, hung over, and went to work for the day. No headache, but a world of stomache issues (not that you asked, but I like to share, because sharing is caring). Nonetheless, I had a pretty good day. Laughed alot with our temp, who is amazing, and who's last day it also is.. I flirted with the cute new guy as well. I had a wicked amazing sandwitch for lunch. It was freaking yummy.
And yet, when I came home all the good posativity just leaked away, and I was, am, left tired, and just feeling lonely. I've had good pasta and am watching Sex and the City reruns on Cosmo tv.. which I guess, has left me here: blogging about being melancholy. Despite the people I've known these past few years, I don't feel that there's anyone that I could call up right at this moment to talk about my day, or how it changed from pretty awesome to weird, which, in the end, I guess is my problem: there isnt anyone in my life that I feel close enough to, or trust enough, to let in like that. Because of that, I'm lonely, and its my own damn fault.
All in all, I guess what sums it up is that I really want that warm and glow-y feeling that comes from really feeling cared for. Thats all I guess.
feedback?
Love,
Lia
I had people over last night, we laughed, we drank, we reminiced because we've all known eachother for a long time now. It was a good night... this morning, I woke up, hung over, and went to work for the day. No headache, but a world of stomache issues (not that you asked, but I like to share, because sharing is caring). Nonetheless, I had a pretty good day. Laughed alot with our temp, who is amazing, and who's last day it also is.. I flirted with the cute new guy as well. I had a wicked amazing sandwitch for lunch. It was freaking yummy.
And yet, when I came home all the good posativity just leaked away, and I was, am, left tired, and just feeling lonely. I've had good pasta and am watching Sex and the City reruns on Cosmo tv.. which I guess, has left me here: blogging about being melancholy. Despite the people I've known these past few years, I don't feel that there's anyone that I could call up right at this moment to talk about my day, or how it changed from pretty awesome to weird, which, in the end, I guess is my problem: there isnt anyone in my life that I feel close enough to, or trust enough, to let in like that. Because of that, I'm lonely, and its my own damn fault.
All in all, I guess what sums it up is that I really want that warm and glow-y feeling that comes from really feeling cared for. Thats all I guess.
feedback?
Love,
Lia
Friday, July 16, 2010
I Have A Fucking Issue With...
So, story is, that I have a fucking issue with people who french manicure their toenails. I think its revolting. I mean, really guys, really? Who the fuck wants to see some long ass toenails pokin out of your otherwise cute peeptoe heels, or worse yet, flip flops that leave nothing to the imagination. Just gotta tell you bitches, it is not, under any circumstances pretty, ok, or.. christ on bike. I just don't have the words, so, I'll give you a picture.
This blog has been brought to you by summer footwear
Monday, July 12, 2010
Pass On Some Love
So, story is that this is going to be another work related thing. Today a lady came into the bakery and poked about, ordered, and we got into a small conversation. The weather etc, etc, at the end of the conversation, I told her that her hair was fantastic. And Goddamnit it was! BIG BIG BIG curles all over her head, popping out from under her headband.(her hair was like the picture, but instead of a serenly smiling white girl who looks like she's rolling her eyes, imagine a sassy african american lady with dark pink lipstick and a headband. She looked amazing)
She also looked like I’d handed her the world on a silver plate her smile was that big.
Moral of the story is that though it may not feel like it, the words that we say to others make a difference, and could impact someone’s day either negatively or in a wonderful way.
This isn’t the first time I’ve had this thought, but it does occasionally reoccur, and each and every time I’m amazed anew at the difference everyday things make in my day. I smiled all day long, because of the way that this lady smiled at the compliment that I gave her.
Pretty awesome hey? Now, here's a challenge for you: see if YOU can pass on some love today, just giving the smallest compliment, can make a persons day. We've all had people do it for us, let's pass it on :D
Peace,
Lia
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Its Just Too Fucking Hot Out
and I'm slightly sunstroked, and I don't have a bathing suit, and theres too many people around to skinny dip, and the only thing keeping me sane are my coke (the drink... duh), my sunglasses, and MY SUPERAWESOME NEW HAT THAT I JUST GOT RIGHT NOW. Look at it. Isnt it amazing? I'm going to wear it EVERYWHERE, because thats just what I'm going to do. Thats all.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
My Milkshake Bringeth All Yon Gentlefolk to Mine Yard
so, story is that apparently everyone found this years ago when the song actually came out, but I just found out about it now. Suffice to say, I'm both peeved and extremely freaking excited. So excited, in fact, that I felt the extreme need to share this:
I think it's the shit. I think everyone needs to see it (again?). I think that Kelis would have been (is, has been?) impressed.
In fact, I think that Kelis should do remixes. I can see me rocking right the fuck out to the old english version at the club. It'd be hot. Oh yeah.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Girl, That is a SHIRT, Not a Dress
So, here's the story of the day, I'm really sick of seeing bitches on the street wearing this:
thinking that it's completely accceptable that their ass is hanging out JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE WEARING LEGGINGS.
fyi kids, leggings are not pants, and, while they are a comfortable alternative, your dress still needs to cover all the important bits, or you're walking around lookin like a hoochie, and thats just not ok. Also, most of the leggings I have seen/own are somewhat sheer. Not totally sheer, but opaque in a sheer sort of way... if you have leggings, you probably know what I mean (I hope). Being that these leggings are sheer, a girl has to realize that a certain amount of skin is going to be shown, leggings or no leggings. I cannot emphasize this enough.
THEN AGAIN, there are always those amoung us who are way too cool for leggings, and just throw on some boots and a slightly oversize sweater, and think that we're good to go. (see above picture)
Luckily for all the legging lovers out there (ME) there IS a classy and cute way to do this. You see exhibit A, with the white shirtdress and black leggings.
Then theres the hoochie way, with nil leggings, lookin like you just got all over it with your boyfriend, and walked out with his manly pink somewhat effeminite dess shirt on, because all of your clothes are currently sitting in his trash can, due to them having been ripped off. While thats definitly a part of this balanced breakfast now and again, and is hella fun to brag about to your girls over brunch (!), its also not acceptable daywear. Just sayin.
There is also the fact that if your dress/shirt is not long enough to cover your essentials, you run the risk of camel toe. You know that uncomfortable, akward, slightly disgusted feeling you get from seeing an old guy in tight bicycle shorts? Camel toe in leggings causes the same type of feeling. It's not good.
I am here to let you know that you are not good to go, and that you need to put on the aforementioned leggings, AND/OR a longer shirt/dress (pretty please with shiny things on top) OR, preferably, some jeans.
Remember kids, coverage is classy, and camel toe is not.
Love,
Lia
thinking that it's completely accceptable that their ass is hanging out JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE WEARING LEGGINGS.
fyi kids, leggings are not pants, and, while they are a comfortable alternative, your dress still needs to cover all the important bits, or you're walking around lookin like a hoochie, and thats just not ok. Also, most of the leggings I have seen/own are somewhat sheer. Not totally sheer, but opaque in a sheer sort of way... if you have leggings, you probably know what I mean (I hope). Being that these leggings are sheer, a girl has to realize that a certain amount of skin is going to be shown, leggings or no leggings. I cannot emphasize this enough.
THEN AGAIN, there are always those amoung us who are way too cool for leggings, and just throw on some boots and a slightly oversize sweater, and think that we're good to go. (see above picture)
Luckily for all the legging lovers out there (ME) there IS a classy and cute way to do this. You see exhibit A, with the white shirtdress and black leggings.
Then theres the hoochie way, with nil leggings, lookin like you just got all over it with your boyfriend, and walked out with his manly pink somewhat effeminite dess shirt on, because all of your clothes are currently sitting in his trash can, due to them having been ripped off. While thats definitly a part of this balanced breakfast now and again, and is hella fun to brag about to your girls over brunch (!), its also not acceptable daywear. Just sayin.
There is also the fact that if your dress/shirt is not long enough to cover your essentials, you run the risk of camel toe. You know that uncomfortable, akward, slightly disgusted feeling you get from seeing an old guy in tight bicycle shorts? Camel toe in leggings causes the same type of feeling. It's not good.
I am here to let you know that you are not good to go, and that you need to put on the aforementioned leggings, AND/OR a longer shirt/dress (pretty please with shiny things on top) OR, preferably, some jeans.
Remember kids, coverage is classy, and camel toe is not.
Love,
Lia
Don't Worry, Be Happy!
Dear People Who Walk Around Looking Worried All Day,
Lighten the fuck up guys! It's summer outside, stop and smell the goddamn roses! The days are long and beautiful. Now is the time to have friends over for a bar-be-que with copoius amounts of liquor-of-your-choice! Eat, Drink, and be Merry for godssake!I mean really guys, could'ntya crack a smile for me? I realize that it's monday and you're grumpy, but I just gave your your morning donut (watch me make yet ANOTHER reference to working in a bakery), smile!
AND, just because I'm a kind and generous good hearted person, here's a picture of a smily face and a thumbs up, just to make your day shine.
On top of which, if you ask me really nicely with shiny things on top, I will bedazzle you a t-shirt! We could match! In the morning, when you come in to get your donut, we can fist-bump like Obama and Michelle, and grin like we have a secret! Feel better yet? You should :)
Don't Worry, Be Happy,
Lia
Lighten the fuck up guys! It's summer outside, stop and smell the goddamn roses! The days are long and beautiful. Now is the time to have friends over for a bar-be-que with copoius amounts of liquor-of-your-choice! Eat, Drink, and be Merry for godssake!I mean really guys, could'ntya crack a smile for me? I realize that it's monday and you're grumpy, but I just gave your your morning donut (watch me make yet ANOTHER reference to working in a bakery), smile!
AND, just because I'm a kind and generous good hearted person, here's a picture of a smily face and a thumbs up, just to make your day shine.
On top of which, if you ask me really nicely with shiny things on top, I will bedazzle you a t-shirt! We could match! In the morning, when you come in to get your donut, we can fist-bump like Obama and Michelle, and grin like we have a secret! Feel better yet? You should :)
Don't Worry, Be Happy,
Lia
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Pass Me the Bedazzler!
So, story is that I've decided that everyone needs a Bedazzler, to make their lives just that much more fantastic. I want to Bedazzle myself a tie! and a work shirt! (because I keep it classy, as you can tell). I want to bedazzle the shit out of everything I own! I want to Snap, Push & Pop my way to sparkly greatness!
I think Bedazzling might be addictive.
Possibly because, the last time I used a bedazzler (it was two friends and I, who are, for the record, straight males) it was just not ok. My friends, lets call them Jerry, and Louis were bedazzling a shirt for a friend of theirs, as a crank birthday gift. Jerry thought it would be funny to start legitimatly bedazzling the shirt that he was wearing. Because it would be cool. 5 rhinestones in, I heard the words I never thought I'd hear from a straight guy : "DUDE, I was NOT done with that, pass the freaking bedazzler"
LET me tell you that I almost fainted right then and there.
Still, all in all. I want a bedazzler. Alot
You Want Me to Ask a Customer WHAT??!?!!!?
SO, story is that today at work, I was flipping through the Big Book of Cakes, and lo and behold, there was a new cake! Now, I feel that this cake had something special to it. It was a Barbie cake. BUT let me tell you right now that that's not what made it special for me. What made it special for you Lia you ask? Well, let me tell you all about it.
It was the fact that this barbie cake came in 3 (count em, 3) different colours. You can order a Caucasion Barbie cake, a Hispanic Barbie cake, or an African American Barbie cake.
Now, I'm all for diversity, and I think that its wonderful that people are open minded enough now that we can actually stock 3 different colours of barbie for your special occasion pleasure.
HOWEVER, that is also wherein lies my issue. Plain and simple, how the fuck does a bakery clerk go about asking a customer what colour of Barbie would they like on their cake? I mean, I can't very well say "All right, we'll start out with you're name and number... and would you like an African American, Hispanic, or Caucasion Barbie with your cake?" IT WOULD BE RUDE PEOPLE. Rude, I tell you!
What if an East Indian, or Asian person came into the store and wanted and East Indian or Asian Barbie on their cake? For that matter, what if someone came in and wanted a Ken on their cake? I mean, at this point I'd just have to say no because apparently we don't stock boy dolls. Its just not done.
What if a person came in and was racially misread by the clerk taking their order? What if the clerk was all "all right, we'll take your name and number, and I assume you'd like a Hispanic Barbie on your cake?.... oh. you're black. Well we'll just be giving you an African American Barbie then.. oh... your daughter is adopted and is actually white... so... Caucasion Barbie it is."
Does no one else see the unbelivable potential for akwardness here? I mean really. This is just all round a bad plan..
ps. we also got in baby shower cakes, with pink and blue booties for the decorations... what happens if you have a sexually ambigious child? What if you have a hermafrodidic baby? They don't make booties in neutral colours. again. AKWARD.
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